this stressful is killing me

I bet I have just made someone mad this evening, yesterday. I am tired of waiting. I cannot wait any longer. There is a writing. That streesful is something that make us want everything happened NOW. whilst, we have to wait along GoD's time. And that is the correct one. But I keep thinking over something, and it is unended. During the waiting, my mind is crossing over on something and recalling the passing time. Everything has reminds me that someone has hurt me. And not only someone, but anyone. .... I am so stressfulllll. I am sorry... for people whom I have been hurt. Mostly yesterday.

years passed bye already

I should know to ignore my days. They have gone really fast. My hair has getting grey, as well as my age has coming abundantly. I am still searching for my best behalf. On which I thought I have found one. He doesn't even take care of me, and even ignore me at once until forever. I do not know where to go. Deep inside, and not only deep, but in fact I always says, that I should build my own family. But how come, if there is no one ever come anymore? When I was younger, there are kinds of guys coming in and out. But then, now they out of my live one by one. Dissapear just like shaddow on the beach that made of sand. With this guy, I thought, I can take only a few more years, years of waiting, but he is just the same as the begginer. He ignored me. This tears queueing on my lid. But still no one know. I don't trully reject. But they are just passed bye. Waiting is stressful. But the tests are so hard to do and answered. I wish I can have what I supposed to receive. I wish I can get what ever I had planned before. I wish the time coming immediately. But there is kinds of quizes almost all around. How come people cannot understand. Herewith I DO NOT believe in GoD. He doesn't gave me what I asked for. I know, that there is not supposed to wait for long. But it has been toooooooooo long. I have my own decision. That we should end up. And I will go for another. No need to miss anymore. My cheek become very warm. Not because of the weather. But because of him. I hate you FOOL!!!

teaching preschool

it has been almost 2 months after i enter this new school. the environment was so nice and friendly. i never taking care of babies before. since i am the last child in my family. but i just ever taking care of my cousins which so ever they were as same old as me right now. well. the kids are good looking faces and they sometimes sharing their food to me. ahahahah not so many. not so much. but one of the lil girl often feeding me with her bento. only one little pieces. xixixi...... and i of course giving her good score. because she wants top share with others. i wish i always able to share their pix on my face book. but it is not allowed. the policy is our handphone and that is of course becomes my tablet will also be send to the receptionist to be able to be kept with her for several time during class session. and afterward, we can take back our handphone. that is too bad. but anyway..... they were cutessssss....... i wish i can have one of them and bring him or her home to show to my mom. mom... look i have got this.... and i share with my mom. my mom is also responsible with the kids near my house. and those little children are leanring freely with my mom. whenever they have problems from school, as where like homework.... they will go to my mom and learn with her.. my mom of course. i love my mom here and now.... for tomorrow.... xixixixi i do not know... our daily routine is.... too many too describe and too many to be talked about and that makes us sometimes yell to each other... ahahahahahahahaaaa... we have too close relationship. and this has happened since many years ago. we are alike a teachers family... me... i am now a preschool teacher... while my mom is PAUD and my sister is english teacher... bye nowwww

missing between relationship and fellowship

I don't think i am going to tell about loyalty in relationship. But I miss my BF sooooo much. the missest miss i have ever have. I really wish i can tell how much. But I really do not know how to tell. He hasn't called me yet until now. i miss his white broad tummy and his really fresh cute lips. I wish I can even send him more of my cookings. I learn to cook for him. phew i do not know how much i can tell. but thanks God here in this new place of work i am doing now, the fellow are very understanding of my story about him. well..... we first met very long time ago. and we met again afterward. but we were seperated again afterward. and we will meet again in new coming soon. but i cannot contact him. and he hasn't called me yet until now. omg. i miss him so. i thought he has forgotten my asking to him about the future we were araising. but still i sometimes cannot concentrate on my work during free time. it is just annoying. but that was only happend sometimes. actually just once, right after i move my working place. i missed his hands and his bald unhairy leg xixixi. i trully miss him a lot. miss as missed so much....... darn. call me laaahhh babe..........